Each time I visit this place to conduct business, we enjoy a friendly exchange. Within this context, I would say we have a good relationship. His greetings are kind, and our banter is always respectful.
Today, I was simply passing by, so we greeted each other in the same manner we would if I were going in for business. We had our usual back-and-forth, and he gleefully announced that the day was a special one for him. I offered him a small token, which I said I would have taken to him the following day.
He smiled, and I went about my business.
The following day, I bought the token and returned with it like I promised I would have. Upon entering to conduct business, I handed the inconspicuously bagged item to him and instantly saw the surprise on his face, when he peaked in. Not only was he taken aback, but he let out a slight gasp, and his eyes welled up with tears, which he tried to hide by avoiding eye contact. In the bag was one of the two things he had indicated he liked. I saw him; his energy communicated several things:
• A gift once promised but never given
• The love needed but missed
• The pain of no one remembering
• The rejection instead of acceptance
• The childhood pains not healed
He fought hard to hold it in. I guess one could argue that, in some way, he did; unless you knew would you have known. As he hurried by me to put the parcel in the back, his energy palpable, I thought about the many times us folks say we are going to do something for someone, and we don’t. I know I have had many instances of a promise not kept to me, and how disappointing those times were, especially when I was in need and by those who take a lot from me. I am sure that I have also had instances of not keeping a promise. Whatever the reason for a promise not kept, I am happy to have had a first-hand reminder of what it means when we do what we say for someone who is holding on to the hope of receiving it. Although I saw his pain, I saw something else too; I saw the restorative power of a promise.
When he returned from storing his “gift”, he gave me a very subdued thank you, because that’s all he could muster. Although his gratitude was obvious, I took no credit for any of it, and I hope he didn’t give me any of the credit for any of it. God is good! Truthfully, when I asked him about what he liked and promised to take it to him the following day, it was not even my doing. I was simply led, and I chose to obey.
Mark 12:30-31 instructs us to Love God with all our hearts and to love our neighbours as we do ourselves. The problem is many of us do not even know what it means to love ourselves (but that is for another blog), so we really do not possess the capacity to make the connection of the effects of a word not kept. Thank God that in my obedience to keep my word to this man, I was reminded of the role we play in bringing people to God. Extending ourselves tangibly does more than just showcase our ability to give; it serves as an indicator of God’s love and gives hope to the hopeless and mends the broken-hearted and in turn highlights that God works in mysterious ways.
Unfortunately, many rely on the “oh my goodness, I forgot. I am sorry” excuse and go about their day without ever giving a second thought to the impact of not giving a gift promised. We know, however, that the ripple effects of a continuous stream of disappointment can have dire consequences on a person. These may include, but not limited to:
• Feeling unloved
• Believing you are not good enough.
• Becoming untrusting
• Being closed off and reclusive
• Self-condemnation
Once we are led to give and we indicate our intention to do so, and I am speaking specific to those gifts rooted in Christ, we are obligated to honor the person by keeping our word. Ultimately, many of us want to experience compassion and love, which the promise kept has the power to do.
PARENTING, ADVOCACY AND EVERYTHING IN BETWEEN 