Self…? CONTROL!!

Jesus loves little children….

Cows love to graze….

Dogs love bones….

Cats love tuna

And….

I LOVE ice-cream!

Ever since I read that article about Corona and Ice-cream several months ago (and wrote a blog about it), I have been very skeptical about indulging in one of my favourite pass time – eating ice-cream.  Lately, however, I have slowly lifted my self-inflicted ice-cream ban.  So, imagine my absolute delight last Sunday (having craved ice-cream for several weeks) after my early morning supermarket run, when I called the Devon House Ice-cream[1] outlet and was informed at 9:30 a.m. that they were opened. The backstory is that they usually open at noon, but I figured that since it was “mothers’ day’ and due to the COVID restrictions they would be open earlier than normal to facilitate the ensuing lockdown.

I pulled up to the spot, right, and there it was – opened like the lady on the phone had stated. If you know me, you know that the dopamine in my brain was activated.  Let’s just say that the lark had nothing on me.  Yes, I love ice-cream that much!  In my head I am skipping, but I walked calmly toward the entrance, with the intention of buying a small tub for one or two sittings – 16  ounces to be exact.    Now that I think about it, I am the most engaging with customer service personnel when I am in the ice-cream parlour; as soon as I went in, I became my usual ice-cream chatty self.  I am either encouraging the server to push down on the ice-cream when packaging it – that way I get the most from my purchase, or I am negotiating with the cashier who is usually encouraging me to get more.  I typically go once every six weeks. 

Now I know y’all are thinking… how can someone who loves ice-cream that much indulge this infrequently and small amounts at a time?  Makes no sense, right?  Wrong!  In the end, this will all make some sense.

Now back the story…. So I go into the store and walk up to the cashier.  I point to the 16-ounce container and tell him that’s the one I want.  He looks at me, as if he has an ice-cream file on me – like the ice-cream gods told him my secret, and he says to me, like the ice-cream dealer he is… “we have a special today.  Are you sure that is one you want?”

I see the tactic, so I stand firm… “Yes, that IS the one I want…. The second one from the bottom – the 16 ounces,” so as to make it abundantly clear.

“Well,” he said, “we are having a special today.  You can get 2 quarts for $3,000.00” (US$19.90). 

I am smirking under my mask… half delighted and half annoyed (because although I would want more than the 16 ounces, I don’t NEED it).

He continues his sales pitch, “Usually the quart is $2,000.00 (US13.26), but if you buy two quarts, you get both for $3,000.00 (US19.90). 

Do the math people.  My 16 ounces cost J$1,200.00 (US$7.97); the quart, which is twice the amount of the one I am purchasing is more affordable, so it makes sense that I get the special.   You get the gist. 

I looked him straight in the eyes, and with all the agency that I have over myself I said, “No, Sir!  NO special for me today.  I have to exercise some amount of self-control….”  Mary Prince, Rosa Parks and Nanny of the Maroons would be proud of me.

By this time, we are both chuckling, because he knows.  I continued, “If I buy the quart or even the special you are promoting, I will end up eating them all in the space of days….so nope.  NO. THANK. YOU”

At least he knows when to quit; so he hands me my receipt, and I saunter over to my right to collect 16 ounces of my favourite ice-cream on the planet.  I chit chat a little bit with my server, who does as I instructed:  she jam-packs my mango-passion and strawberry ice-cream into my 16-ounce container, and I was merrily on my way!  My evening was gonna be blissful (I would wait until after dinner to consume).

I must tell you though.  I was very tempted…. VERY. VERY. VERY TEMPTED to purchase that wonderful ice-cream deal! But I am not like the normal/average human being, who is able to store ice-cream in their refrigerator for months and partake once in a while! Nope, and I am not ashamed to say.    If I have those two quarts jam-packed with my favorite flavours, I will devour it morning, noon, and night until it was all gone.  It would not have made it a week! 

This is my ice-cream eating conundrum, which is why I control my ice-cream purchasing.  I know my weakness, and I will not be controlled by it.  I have been asked/offered ice-cream, and I often say no, for this reason.  I usually get either get a single cone or I take away 16 ounces, ie I get the icecream I want when I do (mostly a cone or 16 ounces).

Let’s just say that I had an awesome after-dinner-delight that evening!

Moral of the story?

As I often say, “every weh yuh tun, lesson di deh fi learn” (everywhere you turn, there is a lesson to be learned).  So, here goes:

Every single person has a vice (a bad habit; a weakness, etc.).  Every single person has that thing or two that we struggle to control.  Something that if we do it or too much of it, the outcome can be devastating.  That thing could be anything ranging from eating too much candy, ice-cream, cake, etc., to lying, cheating, to having unprotected sex with multiple partners to stealing….inability to say no… anything.

As for me (and I am not suggesting that this is the only one), if I consume ice-cream to match my love for it, there are many not-so-desirable things that WILL happen (I don’t even have to list them here); therefore, I.  DO. NOT! 

I am yet to meet a person without a vice; I have, instead, met those who claim they have none.  Yeah, right!! 

Regardless, we have to learn to control ourselves.  We have to exercise self-control, because most times it is not just for the benefit of us, but for the benefit of those in our lives and sometimes for the benefit of a larger community, no matter how sweet the “deal” appears.  Self-control requires deliberate and intentional self-talk and understanding the significance of making the right choice.  Most times our vices fulfil TEMPORARY GRATIFICATION and in the end we are left to sit in regret or something more sinister.  For the people in the back, I am also not suggesting that I always operate in control…. Oh no honey! But I make every effort to.

My talk to myself on this ice-cream buying Sunday was “SELF?  CONTROL!”  and it worked!

And for all y’all whose vice is to pull down your mask under your chin to speak to someone standing in front of you…. RESIST THE URGE!  DO.  NOT. DO. IT!

I promise you… we can hear you well enough under your properly-worn mask.

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[1] https://www.nationalgeographic.com/travel/article/ice-cream-parlors